Excuse me, but do you know your ankles are swollen?

Excuse me, but do you know your ankles are swollen?

STAT reported that Eli Lilly and the FDA had granted special access to the experimental drug retatrutide through the agency’s “compassionate use” program, which allows patients with serious or immediately life-threatening conditions to receive unapproved treatments. The drug has not yet received FDA approval.

The patient – who I call Patient X) was described as a 79-year-old man with refractory obesity, obstructive sleep apnea, and pulmonary hypertension. Now who does that sound like? Well the democrats were quick to demand whether the mystery patient was the president. In a letter to HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Sen. Maggie Hassan (D-N.H.) wrote that she was “deeply concerned” by reports suggesting someone “may be bending the rules of a federal program, and exerting improper political pressure, in order to provide a well-connected individual with free access to an exclusive prescription drug.” Of course the White House denied any connection. Communications director Steven Cheung dismissed the STAT reporter as a “big idiot” on X.

Rep. Ted Lieu (D-Calif.) went further, suggesting that Patient X might be the president suffering from a “terminal illness,” citing video of the president appearing to doze off during Cabinet and Oval Office meetings. Cheung responded by calling Lieu a “dumbass” in a separate X post.

Speculation on the president’s health isn’t new. Trump has been photographed with bruising on his hands, which he has attributed to frequent handshaking and daily aspirin use. He has also appeared in public with swollen ankles and was diagnosed last year with chronic venous insufficiency — a condition common in people over 70. (Is that why my ankles are swollen?) The president’s most recent physical recorded his weight at 238 pounds, a 14-pound increase from April 2025 and at the threshold of clinical obesity. The White House, predictably, described him as being in excellent health.

Which brings us back to retatrutide. It would not be the first time Trump received medication under the FDA’s “compassionate use” program. During COVID, he was given a monoclonal antibody cocktail through the same pathway. The difference here is that retatrutide isn’t for a life-threatening illness. It is an experimental anti-obesity drug. Developed by Eli Lilly, it acts as a triple hormone receptor agonist targeting GLP-1, GIP, and glucagon receptors. Clinical trials have reported average weight loss of 15–24% over 48–72 weeks. Common side effects include nausea and diarrhea.

So if all of a sudden the president starts throwing up and running to the bathroom we can rule out pregnancy. And if he starts losing weight, then maybe, just maybe, he is patient X.